The Rules of Manny Pacquiao « Too Much Noise

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The Rules of Manny Pacquiao

Tuesday, January 31, 2006

Mannyboy!

Manny Pacquiao is indeed awesome:

Don’t ever try to win a bet against Pacquiao. The last time he lost, he slammed the guy’s face on the ground so hard he created a mile-wide crater and sent loads of dust in the atmosphere. That is how the dinosaurs were wiped out.
Pacquiao is powered by Motolite batteries. (Thanks, gmo_free !)
Hitler did not commit suicide. He was punched to death by an annoyed Pacquiao. It was deemed too awesome for the public to know, hence a much-tamer version of Hitler’s death was publicized.
Chuck Norris wets his pants whenever he hears Pacquiao’s name.
Boxing was invented to keep Manny Pacquiao from knocking out people cold at random.
Pacquiao invented the iPod. Steve Jobs is a f*cking liar. He’ll be punched to death soon.
Before every bout, Pacquiao doesn’t pray for victory. He prays for the salvation of his opponent’s soul.
Pacquiao is the only person in the world who can punch by osmosis.
The entire book of Revelations describes how Pacquiao once became so drunk he caused the end of the world.
Pacquiao does not lose. He gets bored.
Pacquiao was not concieved. He punched his way into existence.
Pacquiao has sneezed only once in his lifetime. The aftermath is now known as Chernobyl.
Pacquiao killed Dumbledore.
Pacquiao can rewind a VHS tape by looking at it.
Vin Diesel and Pacquiao once faced off in the ring. Guess who won.
Pacquiao once tried to sell his soul to the devil. He wasn’t able to do it, because the devil was scared sh*tless.
Pacquiao can stare at you with his eyes closed.
You only live because Pacquiao allows it.
Brokeback Mountain was supposed to be a movie about Pacquiao, but the director chickened out and did a movie about gay cowboys instead.
Pacquiao will find out about this blog and beat the crap out of this writer.

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Posted by ade at 12:17 pm | permalink

Previous Comments

When Manny Pacquiao wants balut right now, he grabs a raw duck egg and boils it by just staing at the egg.

Posted by J-Mo at November 12, 2008, 10:46 am

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